Human beings have an amazing capacity to keep different aspects of their lives in tidy little compartments, often trying to ignore the contradictions between these compartments.  

Neatly defining each compartment in our life gives us the illusion of control. We don’t want to accept that life can be very unpredictable, random and messy.

One such compartment is our personal life. We like to make our own decisions on how we spend our time and our money. Another compartment for many of us is our life with our spouse and family. Our ideal is that we are happy and content individuals, surrounded and supported by a loving family.

In reality, these compartments regularly collide.  Our spouse wants us to do things we don’t want to do.  The needs of our children take priority over our personal leisure interests. The family we expect to support us often seems like it is criticizing us. The people we most should love can be very unlikable. Our role in our community requires us to be selfless.

Another compartment is our work career. Our ideal is interesting work that provides a sense of meaningful accomplishment. We want to provide for our families, making enough to support the lifestyle we desire.

The reality is often different. Our job demands time we would rather spend with our children. Sometimes our work feels soulless, as we grind through our workdays out of quiet desperation for a life-sustaining paycheck. We can lose our sense of humanity in a cut-throat capitalistic market and competitive job environment. Our employers can demand actions from us that contradict our morality.

Our broader community is another compartment we have to manage. We may be introverts and find it hard to open up to new people. We may be too guarded to allow relationships to grow deeper than superficial social acquaintances. We may know a lot of people by name, yet feel profoundly lonely.

There are two giant communities within which we exist and have to function.  

One is our country. We are all Americans, bonded by the ideals of our Founding Fathers. Yet we all struggle with resolving conflicts between what is right for us vs. what might be right for our collective American community. We glorify the individual in our country but often our country needs us to be selfless for the greater common good.

Our largest community is the 8-plus billion people that inhabit Planet Earth.  We all want to eat and have shelter. We all want safety from each other. We all want opportunities for our children to have a fruitful and happy life. When we take more than our share of the collective bounty in the world, then someone else is going to get less. Often our national patriotism conflicts with this largest community.

Our faith life is a compartment. We may attend church regularly, tithe, and volunteer our services. But is this the same as practicing our faith in every waking moment of our life? If we’re Christian, how easy do we find it to apply the many lessons of Jesus?  A common self-guiding question we use is, “What would Jesus do?” But the reality is that the answer can often seem impractical or overly idealistic.

In my last column, I noted that 75 million Americans – who I’m certain have morals and values grounded in faith – voted for someone who has no morals and values other than self-promotion.

The fact is, life is very messy and chaotic. It can be cruel and unfair from birth, as a recent writer of a letter to the editor noted in this paper. It can be very difficult to align our life compartments in this reality.

As we celebrate the birth of Jesus, it is an ideal time to put him at the center of our lives and use his lessons to resolve the conflicts in our not-so-tidy life compartments we are trying to manage. May we listen closely and give our conflicts and contradictions to God. May we constantly remember that whenever two or more of us are gathered, Jesus is with us through each other.

And, may you all experience the Grace of God this Christmas and throughout the coming year.