One of the things I’m really going to miss about teaching in a school with a bunch of hooligans is the pranks that usually begin to crop up around this time of the year.

And by hooligans, I mean teachers.

I’ve always been blessed to work with at least a few teachers who like to have a little fun. Sure, there are sticks in the mud who say things like “You play too much” and “We need to be more professional” and such.  

But they aren’t foolin’ me at all.  They like to have fun as much as the next guy.

Still, I’ve discovered that there are different levels of pranking, and some folks don’t like certain levels.  

There are people who don’t like to be scared.  They don’t find it funny when someone jumps out and says “Boo” or makes a loud noise.  So, one has to be selective in those cases.

I’ve always liked to start off my October pranks with reference to the old witch in my classroom. I’ve had this old stuffed witch for years, and every Oct. 1 she shows up in my desk chair.  I act as though she isn’t there. Later, I walk over to her and give her a female teacher’s name and say something like “Mrs. Smith, don’t you think it’s time to head back to your classroom?” This is followed by that “Oooooo” noise that means the entire group of kids is going to turn on you and tell the teacher what you said, which was my goal anyway.

I think my witch reference started when I used to work at Walmart. For some reason, in the middle of that multimillion dollar store, I had to walk up to the service desk to borrow a broom when it came time to sweep up behind the electronics counter, which was the department I worked in.  So, every night, I’d go up to the service desk and take the broom.  

Like clockwork, the old gal behind the counter, a good friend and lots of fun, would say “Where you goin’ with my broom?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll have it back in plenty of time for your ride home,” I’d say. 

It was part of my evening ritual and we always laughed.

I still use the broom reference when I talk to kids.  A little brother or sister will be at the grocery store with a student, and I will ask how old they are or what grade they are in, followed by “Who is your teacher?”  

After they tell me, I usually say “Oh my.  You know she rides a broom to school don’t you?”

Some parents think it’s funny and some look at me as though I must be senile. But I get a good laugh, and that’s what counts.

Phone pranks used to be so dang much fun, but with technology these days, phone pranks aren’t what they used to be.

I have a friend from Spain who has a thick accent and who is a bit of a spitfire. I once played a prank on her for a good three months in which I’d call and leave messages as a “friend” from Spain, talking loudly and with a thick accent myself.  

I’d go on and on about how good it had been to see her, asking her all types of questions. Then, I’d leave my phone number – always hanging up when it came time to leave the last couple of numbers.  

Now, I should mention I was in cahoots with her own daughter, who helped me with the prank.  She’d let me know when her mother was out of the house, and with this collaboration, we kept it going for, as I said, several weeks.  

It was great fun.

Since this is my last year teaching, I’ve got to come up with some original content in order to go out in a blaze of glory.  

Anyone know any good pranks to play on overworked, crabby teachers who aren’t retiring soon?

Please send ideas to marksremarks10@gmail.com.