I have often wondered, during my teaching career, how many parents simply want a break.  I mean, how often did we wish we had an easy kid to take care of; one that didn’t get into anything, have any issues, or could basically fend for themselves? 

It doesn’t make us bad people to wish that once in a while.  

Teachers are in the same boat from time to time.  Some of them are always in the boat.

There have been plenty of parents over the years who have told me what a chore it is to take care of their children. I’ve had numerous parents ask my opinion in front of their children, as if my idea of how to behave held more power than their own position as the parent.

One parent once asked me to tell their daughter she was too young to walk Main Street with her friends. Shocked that her 8-year-old daughter was standing there rolling her eyes, I simply said “Listen to your mom. She’s the boss.”

I’m convinced many parents don’t know what they are getting into when they become parents.  Many of them love the cute baby stage or the times they get to dress them up and show them off. Many are in it for the accolades they themselves receive, as if their children and the praise they received fulfill a great need for attention and affirmation.  Some moms are in it for the shopping aspect and being allowed to plan a wedding, while fathers can’t wait to live vicariously through their sports star sons and daughters.

Some of the same things can be adapted to the teaching profession.  

I could judge all day.  I’m particularly harsh and judgemental with parents. 

I shouldn’t be, but I am.

I’m also a little crabby and judgmental about teachers who don’t do their jobs.

OK, a lot crabby and judgemental.

I’m also convinced some parents want their kids to be as self-sufficient as possible, as soon as possible.  They want kids who take care of themselves. They want kids who “go play” and who require little attention or work.  

This type of mentality carries over into the world of teaching. Some teachers, whether meaning to or not, gravitate toward the low-maintenance kid who just needs a little guidance here and there, but largely works on their own.  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard of teachers who approach, call or email a previous teacher and almost accusingly ask “What did you do with so and so last year?” 

It’s as if the blame is put on the previous year’s teacher – especially if the kids require extra work.

There are plenty of lazy teachers out there, and most of them talk a good game and appear to be on top of things, yet rely on colleagues to plan for them, copy papers for them and basically do as much of their work as possible.  They are master delegators, and those types of teachers become masters at always coming out of a situation smelling like a rose.  

But they rarely fool their colleagues.

Those same teachers like the fun kids who speak up or kids who are well-behaved at all times. They tend to like well-dressed, sporty kids whose parents have a little money.  Those kids are usually easy to teach, and as long as the teacher showers praise and fun on them, the parents are supportive.

Teachers of that caliber don’t like to deal with shy kids, or kids who may be on the spectrum. They definitely don’t like maladjusted kids who have a defiant nature or need special treatment. Probably the most unpopular students with teachers like this are the ones who require extra academic or organizational help.

It’s a shame to say it, but I’ve been in this profession long enough to back up my story.

Now I’m going to be up front with you: there are days that I can lump myself right in there. I like it easy much of the time.  However, I feel like I know the value of making sure those kids who don’t fit in are taken care of. I wasn’t always like this, and it took me a few years of growing up and maturing as a person and teacher to realize how valuable it was.

Even when I’m dealing with a high-maintenance kid, I talk under my breath, bite my tongue, and think about the good old days when discipline was handled differently. But I am thankful that I’ve seen enough kids succeed and thrive as a result of teachers who took just a little extra time and TLC.

Don’t you wish everyone could have just a short glimpse into a crystal ball?  We could maybe catch some info on the challenges of parenting and teaching, decide if we’d be able to learn and grow into jobs, or make the decision to go a different route.

I wish I weren’t so judgemental, and I certainly don’t want people to think I’m all full of myself, thinking I’m the epitome of the perfect educator.  Look, I just want us to all get over ourselves and know that kids require a little work from time to time.

And usually it pays off.  Call it wisdom, call it experience. I just feel like I know what I’m talking about.