Ever since I began dealing with children, I have simultaneously dealt with the ongoing battle of kids not wanting to dress properly.

No, I’m not talking about dress codes or inappropriate clothing. I’m talking about wearing enough clothing when it’s cold outside.

I first noticed kids not dressing properly a few years after I started teaching. I’d have both girls and boys come to school with shorts and sweatshirts on.  I didn’t notice this too much in the fall, nor did I really notice much into the month of November and December. I mean, you know as well as I do how mild our weather can be in those months.

But I suddenly began noticing when the temps dipped down near freezing or below.  There would be the same kiddos, coming to school with short-sleeved shirts, light jackets or “hoodies” and shorts.

At first, especially before I had my own children, I was appalled and very judgmental of parents who sent their children this way. How in the world was this happening? I would shake my finger. I even wrote a tactfully “scolding” blurb in my weekly newsletter urging parents to enforce the coat rule. At the elementary school, we wouldn’t allow kids to play at recess unless they were dressed properly. Nothing seemed to work for long, though.

Embarrassed parents would come to school during conferences and apologize profusely, making sure I didn’t think they were poor parents. They’d explain how it was a daily battle and how kids complained of the classroom being too warm or getting too hot during P.E. I still found it hard to understand, being a non-parent yet still an expert on how to parent. Or so I thought.

Low and behold, along came my two boys. When they were babies and little boys, Michelle and I bundled them up with hats and mittens and warm coats.  The whole bit. We made sure they had warm clothing on around the house and fussed at them when they insisted on taking off their shoes and socks at the earliest opportunity.

Our older son, being the dutiful and diligent first born, was usually pretty compliant and would wear the prescribed clothing. Our younger, more rebellious son would doff as many clothes as possible, regardless of the weather. Comfort was always his main goal.

There began a constant battle each day. I would get the question “Dad, can we wear shorts today?” It would be late October or early November.  The forecast would be windy with a high of 42. “No, you may not.” Whining, gnashing of teeth, nasty looks. Yet, shorts were not worn.

As they grew older, they worked harder at their case. I got to where I would allow it if the temp was above 40 and if there would be a warm sort of outfit covering their torso.

Deception soon came into the mix. It was easy to wear sweats over the top of shorts, take the sweats off at school and put them on before coming home. However, it really stinks when your dad works at the school you attend. Many times, they were busted.

When my oldest went to the big school down the hill, he would head over to the elementary school after their earlier bell. By the time I was walking my students out for pick-up, he was hoofing it across the parking lot to catch a ride with me.

One day, the wind chill was awful. We were all bundled up, wading out into the choking cold to wave quickly at parents and hope everything would be smooth so that we wouldn’t need to stand outside for long.

Suddenly, there appeared an odd sight across the playground.  A shocked student pointed and yelled, “Mr. Tullis, look at the boy with a short sleeve shirt on and no coat!” I glanced in that direction and was ready to spit nails when I saw that it was none other than my oldest  son.  I let him have it, right there and then, in front of my colleagues and others. It probably wasn’t something I should have done, but I was livid. What was this silly kid thinking?

There were all kinds of excuses. The coat was left in the locker. It wasn’t cold until he’d been outside a while.

On and on. Nothing convinced me. As I looked at him, I was sure he would succumb to pneumonia at any moment.

But that was a defining moment for me. His younger brother defended him. Although I punished him for being so irresponsible, I started thinking about picking battles. Was he cold? I was upset that this kid decided to go without a coat when the thermometer read 20-something with a wind chill well below zero. Anyone would have been on my side.

“We hate coats. They won’t fit in our lockers. We get hot in class. We aren’t as cold as you are. It’s uncomfortable to wear jeans.” I heard excuse after excuse.

So, I decided to let them be.  I still insisted on coats on very cold days, but I decided to just let the shorts and hoodie thing go. I figured if they got cold enough, they would wear a coat.

I didn’t care what other parents or teachers thought anymore. I wish I could apologize to all the ones I had judged unfairly.

Yes, I wish my kids would always wear coats and protect themselves from the elements.  They still insist that they get too hot. My little one takes her shoes and socks off just like her brothers. I don’t understand it.  As I have often said, the older I get, the colder I get.

I noticed there was an article on Facebook about boys not wanting to wear anything but shorts and hoodies. I haven’t had time to read it, but I’m sure it’s interesting.

As I write this, we have just gotten through our first really cold day of the year. I’m proud to say both my boys had on long pants and warm top coverings. We have no problem with the girls and don’t need to fuss a bit at them.

My oldest son even had a winter coat on today!

No foolin’. A winter coat!  I’m so proud.